Mom’s Charity Work

Apr 25

Recently my mom had considered flying to Colorado with her husband to attend his niece’s wedding reception, and since I travel to Colorado regularly for work, I wanted to try and coordinate our trips so I could see them. Unfortunately, they decided not to take the trip. My stepdad has been working a lot lately and didn’t want to take the time off to go to Colorado. I chatted with my mom about the nixed plans and learned about the interesting “charity work” she does. Me: “What do you do while Kurt’s working?” Mom: “Lots of stuff! I busy!” Me: “Like what?” Mom: “I do charity.” Me: “Really? Where?” Mom: “I go to John’s.” I stifled my laughter. Only my mom would consider visiting her son and bringing him food as charity work. Me: “That’s it?” Mom: “I do stuff for Korean church too.” Me: “Really? Like what?” Mom: “Lots of stuff! Summer time I grow vegetables and give to them. Winter they have Sunday service and then brunch. I cook for poor. Make them kimchi.” Me: “That’s nice of you.” Mom: “I call them today though, tell them I’m not coming in. I go to mall instead — lots sales. I buy really nice ties.” I love that my mom played hooky from doing charity work so she could go shopping. Me: “Ties? What’d you buy those for?” Mom: “John need ties for principal job! I buy ties for him.” No joke, my brother is 36 years old with a successful job, yet she still buys him work clothes as if he couldn’t afford to purhase them himself. Me: “Oh.” Mom: “Nice ties! Big sale, designer brands — Roff Lorn. You know?” Yes, I’m familiar with the designer Roff...

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Mom’s Hockey Play-by-Play

Apr 22

Being from Michigan, I’m practically hard-wired to root for the Detroit Red Wings. Unfortunately, after moving to Seattle, my hockey knowledge has dropped off considerably. The Emerald City doesn’t really follow hockey. (Or any team that’s not winning, for that matter – if the Mariners or Seahawks aren’t doing well, nobody cares about sports whatsoever. There’s a recent hipster interest in the Sounders because soccer is sooo euro-chic, but I suspect that’ll drop off once they have a disappointing season.) I don’t think of my mom as a sports fan or even being that cognitively aware of sports, but every so often she manages to surprise me. One time when I was visiting, I watched a Pistons game on TV and my mom would putter in and out of the room, seemingly not paying attention. At the end of the night, however, she called her husband who was at work and gave him a decent summary of the game in her standard 85% English. Last weekend I called her to see what she was up to. It turns out she was watching the Red Wings play the Phoenix Coyotes in Game 2 of the first round playoffs. Me: “Hey, it’s me.” Mom: “Hi honeyyyyyyyy!” Me: “What are you doing?” Mom: “I watching game with Kuht. Red Wings versus Air-e-jone-uh Phoenix Dogs.” I stifled a snort. Dogs, coyotes, close enough. Me: “Oh yeah?” Mom: “Kuht want to make bet before game but I say no. Red Wings killing Dogs!” Me: “That’s good.” Mom: “…he swish guy ‘cross face. He have to go off ice, get stitches.” (After looking up a game recap, I found out Mom was talking about Johan Franzen, who got hit in the face by Shane Doan’s stick before crashing into the boards.) Me: “Wow.” Mom: “…that goalie so dorky! He look like golilla…4-0, ha-ha. Man, they killing Air-e-jone-uh. I shoulda bet Kuht mony on game. Hey Kuht, $300!” Me, laughing: “You can’t make a bet once the game has started, Mom!” The Wings held onto the win that day and ended up sweeping the series 4-0. I can’t wait to hear Mom’s commentary in Round...

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